they always said that sex would change you...

Some Dresden Dolls lyrics (see subject line) got me thinking about sex. (I've noticed, a lot of things make me think about sex. But that's another matter. Great way to stay awake in lectures though, I'll have you know!)I remember when I was younger, and more innocent. I had never been kissed or properly fancied any real guy. I say real because, of course, I had massive crushes and fantasies about anime characters, book characters, etc. Saiyuki and YYH and Harry Potter were large sources of these very attractive imaginary males.Does anyone remember that phase in their life? Those little fantasies, daydreams, little stories. And for me a lot of it wasn't romance, it was lust-filled and crazy and wild (quite amusing now, considering my lack of experience).But then I encountered real guys. Semi crushes, flings, making out... and after a while, my first proper boyfriend.The boys I used to fantasy about crumpled like the paper they were made of before the real maleness before me. And now that I've been dumped, I just feel kind of sad and lonely. I went through the rebound phase of "finally! it's great to be single and sexy and about town!" and now I just feel... I don't know, actually. Empty. Low. Wondering whether there actually is anyone out there worth my time.An attempt to return to the books that used to be a source of endless comfort was frustrating. Daydreams don't satisfy me any more.I want a guy. But not just a lovesick puppy (trust me, I tried that, and ended up feeling very guilty for using him to clear up any remaining rebound issues). Lovesick puppy type guys... I personally find them a turn off. I don't know why. It's just too easy. I want a challenge. Someone that keeps me on my toes. An attractive bad boy with his left eyebrow pierced (don't ask why, I don't know either) and with amazing skills in bed. Preferably with dark hair and green eyes, but I suppose blond is okay too.I guess I want a lot. But who doesn't? I guess I'm still expecting to find true love... I'm sure you all have similar stories. What are your tricks to being 100% happy and self-confident whilst single?And by the way... if you see my guy, please send him in my direction. ;)